Making Mindful New Years' Resolutions: How Do You Want to FEEL This Year?
Happy New Year friends!
I am sure I'm not alone in the relief I feel entering this new year. It's less some dream that everything will be different right away (sigh, it won't) and more pride that I made it through 2020. We walked through so much as a collective last year and are still here to talk about, and learn from, it.
Are You A Human-Doing?
Over the past few weeks, I took some time to rest and digest all that the year taught me. I don't want to lose these hard-earned lessons and growths. And while I feel like all of the lessons could fill a book, one is standing out to me as we begin this new year. My ever-evolving journey to move from a "human-doing" to a "human-being". I can get so caught up in endless task lists and goal achievements that I start to believe my joy, my worth, and my well-being will only grow from this place. That my happiness can only happen from this doing and striving for the next thing.
Journey to a Human-Being
And yet last year, having wiped out all of my plans and goals as I saw them, helped me deeply re-relate to how I found my purpose day-to-day. I can't say I loved this lesson (that keeps getting re-emphasized month after month) but I have felt immense freedom in it. Freedom as a result of the search for other ways of finding that joy, worth, and well-being. Because as we know, "things" are all temporary, so relying on them for a deeper meaning will always fail! Thanks 2020 for that lesson you beat into me day after day! 😂😭😂😭
In my "Goodbye 2020" Reiki workshop last month, we spent the first part of the session clearing away the anxiety, trauma, and stuck energy we picked up during the year, but then spent time visioning what we want for 2021. I asked participants to first visualize their goals and dreams for the year and to get really specific on these visions. Are you dreaming of a promotion, a new relationship, house, child, etc.? Picture yourself there, in those moments with the things you want. And then I asked them to drop into how these visions make them FEEL. What do they bring up in the body? What can you notice when you let the feelings wash over you? Joy, Excitement, Love, Passion, Purpose?
This is where I am choosing to focus as we start this new year. Deeper than the thing I want or the goal I hope to achieve, what is it that thing will help me feel? And how can I work today to bring some of that into my life? I don't need to wait on that one moment to help me feel joy/love/peace, I can seek out that feeling today. Mindfulness is a huge help in this process as I have to be able to pay attention to feel when a certain emotion is present. It may not always be a big as I'd like, but even acknowledging a small presence can go a long way.
Staying Curious
As I continue to do my best to stay at home in Los Angeles to help slow the terrible spread of Covid-19 here, my hope is to feel curious. Curiosity has always been my friend, leading me to new places, new learnings, and new relationships. It feeds my heart and soul, making me feel alive (this is one of the reasons I love mindfulness so much, with curiosity in the very definition!). Of course, it can feel harder to find when I mostly see the same four walls, and yet I commit to finding moments of it each day, no matter how small. It has really helped me over the past year and I hope it will continue to serve me as we continue to walk through this global pandemic.
Some ways I use mindfulness to help me stay curious:
Spending time in nature. I open up my senses to the natural world around me on a walk or hike. Feeling the sun on my face, the breeze against my skin, the colony of bugs living below my feet.
Learning something new. I cultivate a beginner's mind by seeking out a book or class on a topic I am interested in. Enjoy the process of being a student!
Connect with loved ones. Asking questions and cultivating new experiences with those I love shows me there is always more to learn about those we think we know best!
Do you want to join me in making a New Years' resolution about how you want to FEEL this year? Maybe walk through the visualization I outlined above, letting yourself dream about the things you want this year, and then drop down into how these things make you feel, what emotions they bring up in your body. And finally, take some time to ponder what can you do today, and every day, to try and encourage that feeling.
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