How Are Your Energetic Boundaries? (Mine Used to Suck).
I've done a lot of work over the years setting boundaries for myself and with others in my life. These tend to be very physical boundaries like 'I will not go there', 'I cannot do that for you', 'You cannot talk to me like that', etc. These are incredibly important and have changed my life in many ways. But only in more recent years did I become aware of the necessity of setting energetic boundaries as well.
I have always been a deeply empathic person, like a sponge soaking up other people's stuff in hopes of lightening their load. For most of my life, I have wanted to help others and ease suffering, so I absorbed and absorbed. Combined with little ability to take good care of myself, this habit seriously affected my well-being. It had me struggling with anxiety and depression that I wasn't even always sure was mine.
This habit also left me scared to be around people at times. When my only way of being was to take on what others had going on, it sometimes seemed better just to stay home alone where I was safe. (I watched a LOT of tv. You can ask my old roommates.)
But when I first started studying Reiki and how we can move or shift our life force energy, I started to learn there was a different way to be in the world. One where I could keep other people’s energy out of my system with proper care and boundary setting. This has opened up my world in many ways but most importantly allowing me to feel safe to be with others (even if they have LOTS of energy going on).
It's a bit ironic to me that I now spend a significant amount of time going into other people's energy while I work to heal and clear my clients' in my 1:1 sessions, but my daily energetic hygiene routines allow me to fulfill my desire to help and support others safely!
I find that outside energy has a way of sneaking into our systems when we are distracted, sick, or emotionally overwhelmed...things that this past year have made crystal clear. The neverending togetherness with our partners, families, or roommates combined with the grief, loss, fear, and constant Zooms, it's inevitable we are all taking stuff on these days. Seeing these blurred energy lines come up a lot for my clients right now, I wanted to offer some simple practices I use to protect myself from the energy vampires. :)
Energetic Bubble
When I wake up each morning I imagine putting myself in a protective bubble (like I used to see on the streets of NYC when you stand inside the giant bubble blower). This bubble lets certain things come inside my orbit, but keeps anything I don't want or need out. Sometimes I put extra layers on top depending on the day I'm going to have.
Magnet
If I'm in a moment where I feel I've wandered into someone else's energy, I like to imagine my body is a magnet drawing all of the energy back into my body. I can even imagine whoever I am with is also a magnet drawing their energy back to their body.
White Light
We are going to pick stuff up, it's unavoidable (see: pandemic conditions above). So I like to use a cleansing and clear white light at the end of the day (or whenever I feel I need it). I imagine white light coming down through the top of my head picking up and burning away any "stuff" that isn't mine.
These practices may feel a little 'out there' to you, but I encourage you to try it out and just see what happens. Sometimes the shift is subtle but over time I have felt the profound support of these energetic practices!